Glesca stories3

.Glesca Stories III

( stories added in no specific order )

An auld Glesca man took his dug, which had just died, tae a priest, an' asked him if he would do a funeral service for the dog. "Certainly not," said the priest,!! "Why don't you try the minister?"
All right said the auld fella. "By the way, dae ye think the minister wid take a donation of a thousand pounds fur his church?"
"Wait a minute" said the priest, "You didnae tell me yur dug wis a catholic!!!"

A couple were invited to a Swanky Masked Halloween Party in Glesca. The wifie had a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted wee Glesca husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need for his good time to be spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went.
       After sleeping soundly for about an hour, she awakened without pain, and as it was still early, decided to go to the party. In as much as her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching him, to see how he acted when she was not with him.
She joined the party, and soon spotted her husband cavorting around the dance floor, dancing with every nice chick he could, copping kisses wherever he could. His wife went up to him, and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his partner high and dry and devoted his time to the new stuff that had just arrived. She let him go as far as he wished, naturally, since he was her husband. Finally he whispered a little proposition in her ear, and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars.
          Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away and went home and putting the costume away got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behaviour. She was sitting up reading when he came in, and asked him what kind of time he had. He said, "Oh", the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there." Then she asked, "Did you dance much?" He replied, "I'll tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Phil, Bill, and some other guys, so we went into the backroom and played cards all evening............ But....you're not going to believe what happened to the guy I loaned my costume to!"